My life and times in Corporate America

My dealings with life at a corporate job straight out of college and fooling my employers into thinking I'm really smart. Rantings about my co-workers, work, and life in general.

Saturday, March 31, 2007

I've been gone for a while...

Wow it has been a long time since I posted. I hope none of my readers have jumped ship. A lot of things have happened.

I passed the second part of my CPA. Yay! I’m taking the next part on Monday, so obviously I’m doing my best to procrastinate and post on my blog instead of studying.

We have a new, fancy bathroom at work. It’s a big improvement on the dungenous swamp we used to have for a women’s restroom. I used to go in there occasionally and find a giant trash can poised under a mysterious drip from the ceiling. It would be there all day, and upon further inspection, the trash can would be filled with a brown grime that I didn’t want to know about. I’m assuming a class action lawsuit will be circulating shortly regarding all the women being exposed to ebola or something. So now we have our very own freshly tiled floors, three auto-flushing toilets and two auto faucets in the sink. It’s all very auto. It’s a new auto-bathroom from the future. The bathroom is beautiful, with a new mirror and shimmering new counter tops. It is the most exciting thing that has happened to our floor. Sometimes I go in there around noon and find women sitting in there having lunch. But I’ve found that using an auto bathroom for most of the day has its drawbacks. When things are too auto at work, I tend to forget they’re not auto everywhere, which leads to me leaving the faucet running after I washed my hands and walking away.

The boy and I are doing well. He is currently secluded in his apartment glued to the TV watching the final four basketball games. He is obsessed with this bracket he is part of at work. I don’t see what these boys get so worked up about, they’ve only bet 20 bucks on the thing, I spent that much on the manicure that I already chipped. But after every game, he’ll shoot over his computer and log into his bracket and check his standings. Then he’ll shout me an update “I’m in second, but only if Georgetown wins, if not this bastard in account payable will beat me.” Then “OK now I’m in third because…” I usually tune out at this point. I hate to think how much time some math nerd spent thinking up the scoring system for these March madness brackets, because I can’t figure them out for the life of me. All I really find interesting about the basketball games is how freikin tall some of those kids are. I mean, they’re like 19 years old and some of them at 7 feet tall! How do they walk through doors? Who do they date? What kind of beds do they sleep on? These are the kind of things I am interested in. Not their points per game or their shooting average. I want to know where they buy their pants.