My latest fetish

Those of you who know me might know that I am famous for going through “food phases.” I become addicted to a random food to the point of exhaustion and then suddenly drop it like it’s out of style. Some of the more notable ones include:

-the great blueberry waffle phase of my freshman year of college.
-the Pokemon popsicle phase of my sophomore year, during which I once snuck an entire box of them into a movie theater and when Maria and I stood up to leave, our shoes were stuck to the movie theater floor with leaked Pokemon popsicle juice.

Well my latest food fetish is much healthier, but only marginally less sticky. While at Costco a few weeks ago, I was shopping with the boy. And after I sent him on a mission into the giant refridgerator room to find some blueberries (Hey that room is too cold for a little girl like me), I noticed that they had a huge stack of flats of white peaches in the produce section. I bought a tray of 12 peaches.

From there the addiction was born. These peaches were so giant and sweet and tasted like candy. I had to have more. So I decided I had to go back to get more.

I then become the crazy peach lady, stopping by Costco after work every other day to spy for newly delivered peaches. But they were never there. Was peach season over? Did I miss it? Will I be forced to temporarily move to another climate that is currently in the boom of peach season to live out the end of this latest food fetish?

One of these times at Costco I was stopped by someone who worked in the produce department, probably because he saw me lifting up boxes of apricots to see if any peaches were stowed beneath them and thought I was some homeless, crazy person. He told me that fresh produce was delivered every Saturday, Tuesday and Thursday. I marked my calendar accordingly. Yet I was sad to discover that even if I went to the Costco on a Saturday, Tuesday or Thursday, there were still no peaches. For weeks I was returning to the Costco in vain. Was I unknowingly at war with another peach fetished person who was raiding all the same Costco mere moments before me? (And by the way, it is nearly impossible to leave a Costco without buying something. Don’t even try it, there’s no way out!)

Finally, last Saturday, Dan and I went back to Costco. I foolishly stopped to try a sample of Hebrew National hot dogs, forgetting the whole reason I was there. What was I thinking?! To the produce department! Then I saw Dan in the distance proudly holding up a flat of peaches. Hooray! I bought two.

The Costco employees must think I’m crazy. For the peaches thing and also because my Costco ID photo on the back of the card makes me look like a pirate. Seriously, it looks like I have one tooth and usually if the cashier doesn’t laugh at it first, Dan will. Every time. Ask me to look at it sometime and you will laugh your ass off. But be sure to say “That looks nothing like you!” as you hand it back or I will think I look like a pirate.

So anyway, back to the peaches. Dan says I’m like a mother hen with her eggs because I check on the 24 little peaches in their tray every few hours. I turn them and squeeze them a little to check for any ripe ones.

So if any of you would like some peaches, I’m sure in a week or so, this latest food fetish will have run its course and I will have bushels of peaches to spare. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some peaches to check on.